I’m reading a wonderful book by Ravi Zacharias called I, Isaac, take thee, Rebekah, which is about “moving from Romance to Lasting Love”.
I actually ordered this book about a month and a half or so after our baby was born (she’s now 4 months) because in my sleep deprived and overwhelmed state, my mind was beginning to formulate unrealistic thoughts about the person I was becoming and the loneliness I was feeling at the time. Although I had always wanted to be a mom and was excited about the arrival of our baby, I was ill prepared emotionally for what was to come. My husband was incredibly supportive during those initial weeks and in my moments of emotional breakdown he would always have a kind and nurturing word or hug to offer. But I felt overwhelmed and the added exhaustion didn’t help, and I began to do what I had always feared, becoming a nagging wife because I felt like I wasn’t getting enough help. Maybe a few times I had justification to react the way I did, but every now and then God would give me a little nudge and I began to realize that more often than not I should have felt extremely blessed with the support and help I was getting from my husband, and yet in my mind it wasn’t enough.
In those initial weeks it was very difficult for me to get away and take a few moments to myself and one day in particular when I was at my breaking point my husband had me step out for a while to be on my own. I remember my first thought (which of course I voiced outloud) was to go shopping for some stuff that we needed and my husband said no, that I needed to go relax and be alone, get fresh air. So with tears in my eyes I picked up my book and went to the park. In that moment God entered into my heart and mind again full force and as I read the pages of Ravi Zacharias’ book I began to realize what he meant by the statement, what “I do” really means. That afternoon I came back home feeling renewed and more appreciative and also understanding of how truly blessed I am. My husband and I talked and I shared a few of the quotes I’d enjoyed from my reading. I haven’t been without flaws since that moment, none of us can be, but I have been able to see things from a different perspective and to thank God every day and realize how blessed we are.
This was one of my favorite quotes from the initial pages that I read:
Love is a commitment that will be tested in the most vulnerable areas of spirituality, a commitment that will force you to make some very difficult choices. It is a commitment that commands that you deal with your lust, your greed, your pride, your power, your desire to control, your temper, your patience, and every area of temptation that the Bible so clearly talks about. It demands the quality of commitment that Jesus demonstrates in His relationship to us.
Love is hard work…It is the hardest work I know of, work from which you are never entitled to take a vacation. You taken on burdens and cares. You inherit problems. You have to feel beyond yourself. You have to think of things other than yourself. Your responsibilities are now multiplied, and you are entrusted with greater commitments.
It’s no wonder I realized that day to stop thinking of just myself but of us as a whole and how we were both affected with the new changes in our relationship and that together, with our love and commitment, during challenging and rewarding moments, our relationship will endure and grow in ways that we hadn’t seen before. Love truly is hard work that takes effort, cherishing, and nurturing.
There’s so many other topics covered in his book and wonderful quotes that I loved which I’m hoping to share here in time. For now though I’ll leave you with this…
The tug of love is a commitment stronger than merely the flutter of the heart.