Life · Parenthood

Grateful for the calm

I love lazy mornings with no plans in sight for hours. They make me feel so calm. The kind where it’s 9 in the morning and everything feels light and airy because there is no rush of an appointment to get to.

It’s Thanksgiving day and not only am I off work, but Manny is home too, and it feels so good to have all four of us home with the only plans on our calendar being dinner at my parents house at 5pm. We all slept well and are rested, and as we finish up breakfast and Manny brings out the chess board for the girls to play a game with him, I make my way to the sink to wash the dishes.

Haha. Yep, I guess I’m real old school that way. We have a dishwasher but I rarely if ever use it. I actually love the calm of washing dishes when it doesn’t feel like another task in the way of a full day. Today, washing dishes by hand on a slow to-do less morning feels soothing.

As I stand there feeling the luke warm water running through my hands and look out the window, while I half listen to my husband and girls playing chess, my heart feels full. I feel so thankful to God for this family, for this home, for our love. I feel an immense gratitude for God’s abundant blessings.

I know there is a lot of hurt and pain in the world, but I also know that there is a lot of light and love. It’s just that the light and the love is not as loud and in your face as the hurt and thus it doesn’t tend to garner as much attention, or people become cynical to it. But not today. Today I am soaking in every moment. And that’s what led me to write.

I feel the most me when I write, even if sometimes I may not articulate things as well as I’d like.

Last week with all it’s fullness and activities was good but also rough for me because I was also on a hormonal rollercoaster. One that sometimes makes me feel completely out of control in my mind, like I am not myself, and if I don’t stop and put the harsh thoughts in check it feels like I will plummet into a depth of dark negativity.

So on days like today, I take my time. I move slowly and take nothing for granted. It feels as if I am hearing my girls voices for the first time and I see them in this new and fresh light. These days restore and balance me.

I hope that wherever you find yourself today, that you will be able to find a moment where you can feel peace and calm. That you are able to pause and think of the blessings in your life, because no matter how small they may be, they matter and they give hope.

Have a blessed Thanksgiving day.

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